We're still in the season so I can still wish you all a very Merry Christmas!! Hope you've been having fun throughout the holiday season. Hmm, my Christmas was just somehow but in all things, I'm grateful.

This year's harmattan has official made me dislike the weather. I used to love harmattan but I can't say that anymore. I was gifted with catarrh and cough on Christmas eve plus some other ish and it eventually generated into a fever. Oh well, I was still in the Christmas mood and I prepared fried rice and salad on Christmas morning while my mum handled owo soup and starch(hello my fellow Deltans!) My eldest brother and his family came to visit later in the day and they also brought food. So food everywhere. I spent most of the day sleeping like I've been doing for a decade now. I've out grown that "let's go out" thing on Christmas day. No more Christmas clothes, shoes and hair anymore.lol!

Boxing day was kinda fun. A special someone took me to the cinema and I got to see the movie "Fifty". Thumbs up to the production company and the entire cast and crew. They did a good job. But I didn't particularly like the end of the movie because it was abrupt. That's my opinion though. Apart from that, its a good movie. The fever dawned on me in the early hours of the next day but thank God, I'm much better now. Yes! So we have less than 50 hours to the new year. Excited much! Bday loading as well*big smile*

A couple of years back, I'll write down all the things I wanted to change or improve about myself on the 30/31 of December and I'll promise myself to be "good" the next year.So on January 1st,I'll be expecting a total transformation, just like that! Did it work? Lol! In more recent years, as I grew older, I learnt that making new year resolutions come from the heart and its a decision one has to make over time. Its not magic. You can't just wake up on January 1 and become brand new. It takes some conscious effort on your part to make those resolutions come into being. So what are my new year resolutions?

First, I want to apologize to anyone who may feel that I don't care about them or ignoring them for some reason. If you know me very well, you'll know that I suck at keeping in touch. If keeping in touch was a course, I'd come out with F9 all the time. It's that bad and I'm working on myself. I love solitude. I like to be alone but when I see a close relative or friend around me, I can become an extreme extrovert. But deep within, I'm so introverted that I sometimes pray about it. So if you feel like I've "abandoned" you, please don't take it personal. That's if we're good friends sha *side eyes* That's it, my first resolution is keeping in touch often.

Secondly, I want to stop procrastinating. I've greatly improved in this aspect and it wasn't something that happened in 5 years. It took time and I'm happy with the progress I've made and I want to make more. Hence, I'm adopting Nike's motto,"Just do it".

I don't know if this one is a resolution oo! But I want to press my phone less in 2016.lol! I don't like the impression some people have of me as someone who's always looking at her phone screen. Let me make this clear, when you see me with my phone, don't assume I'm chatting all the time. Haba! Most times I'm busy googling stuff and reading blogs or going through my Twitter timeline.I'm not addicted to my phone. But nevertheless, less "phone pressing" in 2016, so help me God.

In all, I'm just about bringing out the best version of myself. I love the fact that a new year always ushers in my birthday and it automatically gives me a sense of growth. I can boldly say I like the woman I'm becoming. It took tons of new year resolutions to get to this point and I'm happy it paid off. New year resolutions can happen at anytime of the year though. Forget the new year tag in front of the resolution. Everyday is a new opportunity to start anew so don't be worried if you have nothing in mind for now.

As the year 2015 ends, I'm grateful to God for life. For keeping myself and all my loved ones safe and in good health.I lost love but found it again(don't ask me)lol! To all my good friends, you're loved. I appreciate each and every one of you for all the kind words and encouragement. Even though my family met some challenges early in the year, I still thank God and regard them as life lessons. Life is a graph after all, sometimes you shoot upwards, sometimes you slide. But we all pray to end on the upper side. This year was good and I pray 2016 would be better.

Here's me wishing everyone a prosperous new year. May 2016 be a zillion times better than 2015 for all of us. May we grow from strength to strength and may we continue to be in good health of mind and body.

See you next year!
xo, Evita.

Hey guys! Howdy? Well, I'm doing fine and fully in the Christmas mood. Hope you are too. So today's post is about my Christmas/birthday wish list. It's both of them because my birthday is like 3 weeks after Christmas (January 22nd) that's why I'm merging them. I don't have long throat(greed)lol!

Let me be very sincere, I'm not used to getting gifts for Christmas. We don't take the whole gifting program serious over here in Nigeria as far as I know. The case may be different for you. I'm just saying. For my birthday, well, I used to get gifts when I was much younger and it was always from my mum and dad. But in recent years, a few close friends have presented me with gifts and I've only had 2 birthday cakes in my entire life.LOL! So the fact that I hardly receive gifts doesn't mean that I don't have things I wish to be gifted with.

Ok then, I'm going to imagine that Santa is going to grant my wishes because I've been a good girl this year and I deserve the best *bats eyelashes*lol! Santa can be anyone though. Hehehe!!!*wink* I can also be my own Santa. So here goes my wish list;



I NEED WiFi!!! Cheaper and more reliable internet access. I have tried for these y'hello guys. The amount of money I spend on subscription every month is heartbreaking. I surf the net a lot and this obviously zaps a lot of data. I've tried to cut down my surfing to the barest minimum but it's not been so effective. So, WiFi.




A tab to make blogging and browsing easier. Old age has caught up with my laptop so I just use it to watch movies only. I don't need a new one yet but a tab would be a good replacement for now. Blogging with a phone isn't much fun and it's not good for my eyes. It mustn't be a Samsung Tab 4 though. Any of its equivalent would do.




I have been looking for this book for over a year now and I haven't found it yet. Please if you come across it, help a sister out. Thanks. I'll keep searching as well.




Shoes!!! Can a girl ever have enough shoes? Hmm...




Mac Ruby Woo is just the perfect red lipstick. I like makeup and I'm particularly crazy about lipsticks. I've always had a crush on Ruby Woo so I should try to get it soon or any good dupe of it. I've read some good reviews about Tara's red lipstick (forgotten the name) and it could act as a good substitute. I'm not so keen on getting Ruby Woo.




I stopped being a fan of eye shadows for a long while now because I don't usually get the desired result with those made in PRC. I don't like the loud colours on the pallette because when applied it looks somehow. Urban decay naked 2 pallette is enough to cater for all my eye shadow needs.

That's all! Very simple list and not too expensive right? Hehehe! Yes, so have you made your Christmas list yet? Or you don't want anything? Or you want too many things that cannot be listed? Whatever it is, if it's for your own good, I hope your wishes come to reality.

xo, Evita.

Hello everyone! Let me welcome you to my second favorite month of the year. The month is still fresh so I'm permitted to wish you all the best that December 2015 has to offer.

As we approach the end of this year, I'm quite sure most of us are checking if we accomplished some set goals and just basically reviewing 2015 as it gradually strolls away. Well, its been a personal tradition for some years now, to always review a passing year before the new one comes.

2015 started on a good note. It wasn't perfect but I was happy and my hopes were high. But along the line something happened. For the sake of my family's privacy I won't say, but it pretty much shook us but thank God for being God, we were able to recover from it. At first I was very sad and I was beginning to despair. Then I remembered God's promises to me and it kept me going. What's life without ups and downs anyway? It's part of our human existence.

So, I kept pushing till the middle of the year and something good happened to me. I completed my NYSC successful and moved on to a new phase of life. Before the service year ended, I had mixed feelings. My hopes were high on one end and I was engulfed in fear at the other side. Hopes that I would get a good job before the year ends(very high hopes indeed) and fear that I might have to stay at home for a while before the job comes. We all know the situation of the Nigerian labour market so you can relate with what I'm saying.

Although I had a backup plan in case things didn't go as planned in my head and I opened this blog in June but didn't start publishing anything immediately till August. I didn't start this blog with the intention of making money as most people thought at first. For those that don't know, it takes more than a year before a blogger can even earn $1. It's a very long process that requires patience but that's not my primary aim. I started this blog so I can develop my passion for writing. The money is a bonus.

Now, I'm not a business oriented person at all. I'm not thrilled by buying and selling(but I like money sha.lol! Who doesn't?) But the way things are in this country, you just have to acquire a skill/handwork that can make some money for you. I have plans for this and by God's grace, it'll be in full swing next year with the hope that I'll still get a job.

Despite all that's happened, I still thank God for life. That I'm able to breath and I recovered from all the illnesses that struck me this year, I'm thankful. I hardly fall ill but this year was a different story and I'm really grateful for life.





Most times we tend to focus on what's wrong in our lives and we become ungrateful unknowingly. In as much as you haven't been able to get that dream car, house, job or spouse yet, put on the attitude of thanksgiving. It's easy to say but when you make it a conscious effort, it becomes a part of you.

I'm also exceptionally grateful for the gift of family and good friends. I appreciate all of you for the encouragement and kind words. Thank you.

There you have it, that's my review of 2015. I await the new year with high hopes but not so high so I don't get disappointed if things don't go my way. God's ways aren't our ways, remember. So have you done your review yet? Did you achieve all your goals? We have just 23 days left to 2016 so let the countdown begin! I also have lined up a few exciting posts to share with you.

And to my awesome readers, thank you for always visiting, you're highly appreciated.

xo, Evita.

First of all, let me apologize for not posting consistently this month. I don't want blogging to feel like a chore so I write when inspired to. Please bear with me. I promise to be more consistent. That settled, Christmas is coming oo! Can you feel it in the air?! Yes, I can and I'm just excited for no particular reason. I'm just happy about a lot of things. And I'm especially grateful for life, family and good friends.

So, the topic. Yes! Let's talk about sex. If you know Salt 'n' Pepa then you should know this song, "Let's talk about sex" and my favorite line in it is, " Don't decoy, avoid or make void the topic coz that ain't gonna stop it..." And I'm not here to talk about what it is you think I want to talk about. Whatever that is.

Growing up in an average Nigerian home, sex was something that was never talked about. You know there's something called sex and have an idea what its about but there's no talking about it. Like our parents just assumed we knew and it's something that's forbidden. But being an inquisitive being, I expanded my knowledge about sex by reading books and of course, talking with my peers. I guess this must have been the case with most of us.

When we were taught "The Reproductive System" in secondary school, you could feel the excitement in the classroom, the glee was obvious in our eyes. It was an interesting topic and nobody failed the test on this topic.lol. It was clear we knew what it was all about.



You see, we live in a highly sexualized world. TV shows, adverts, movies, music, clothing and even cartoons are now sexualized. The internet is readily available to dish out every information that there is on sex and our younger ones are being exposed to all these. What do we do? It's time we talk about it.

Of course it'll seem really awkward talking to a teenager about sex but its best they hear it from you (parents, siblings, uncle, aunt, cousin) than from a "friend" or via the internet. Its not something we should be quiet about anymore. Remember the series " I need to Know"? Where Funke Akindele's character was Bisi. Remember how close she was to her mum and how she used to tell her things about sex and give her advice about waiting for the right time. We need more parents and adults like Bisi's mum. Be your child's best friend and be free to talk to them about sex and what it entails.

Research has shown that young people/teenagers want to talk about sexual health with their parents. Many parents are however unsure and uncomfortable about having these conversations and where to start from, but avoiding the subject will not stop their children from having sex or keep them safe. It has also been proven by research that talking to teens about sex does not encourage them to experiment sexually. It goes a long way to prevent unwanted pregnancy, abortions and STDs and these teens are more likely to delay their first sexual experience.



We have to break free from that mentality that things such as sex shouldn't be talked about. It only makes things worse and exposes our young ones to numerous dangerous. Talk to them, be honest, be free. I'm sure if more adults talked about sex to teenagers, there would be less unwanted pregnancies, abortions which can lead to death and STDs.

Have yourselves a lovely and stress free week ahead and compliments of the season to you and your families. May the joy of this season continue to abide with us.

xo, Evita.

Hello everyone! It's been a minute. Hope everything is well with you and yours? Well, on this side, I thank God for life. Everyday above the ground is a good day isn't it? So, today, I'm going to talk(write) about one of my favorite author and mentor, Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie. I'm sure most of you are familiar with the name and know a little bit about her. If you don't, let me give you a brief introduction.

Chimamanda was born in Enugu, Nigeria, in the late 1970s and was raised in Nsukka. Her parents worked in the University of Nigeria, Nsukka and she's the fifth of six children.
When she was 19, she left Nigeria on a scholarship to Drexel University in Philadelphia. She studied communication at Drexel and earned a degree in communication and political science at Eastern Connecticut State University. She graduated summa cum laude in 2001. Later that year, she began MFA courses in literature at Johns Hopkins University.

Now you have a slight idea of who she is and where she comes from. There are a lot of things I admire or love about Chimamanda as a writer. When I read her first book, "Purple Hibiscus", I was still in secondary school at the time and I thought to myself, "who's this fearless woman that's so bold to tell such a story?" And of course I wanted to read more stories from her which I did over time.

I could go on to list a whole lot of things I love about Chimamanda but I compressed them for the sake of this post so I don't get to bore you.
So, here are the 5 things I love about Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie.

1.) She gives very detailed descriptions in her stories; If you've read any of her books you should be able to attest to this. Chimamanda is exceptionally good at describing places and her characters. I've never been to Nsukka but she made me feel like I was in Nsukka with the way she gave vivid descriptions about it in "Purple Hibiscus" and "Americanah". The same way she also described places in the USA like Philadelphia and Brooklyn. In my mind I've been to all these places.lol!



2.) She uses very rare Igbo names for her characters and she chips in a little bit of Igbo vocabulary here and there; It was Chimamanda that made me know there were Igbo names such as Ranyinudo, Anikwenwa, Nwamgba, Obierika and a few others. She shows that she's very conversant with her Igbo roots despite her schooling in the US and she's proud of her people.



3.) She's very passionate about gender especially females. Her female characters are very outspoken and question what is deemed normal; her lead character in "Americanah", Ifemelu is one of such.



Chimamanda encourages the typical African girl child to be outspoken and say things as they are without being afraid of being judged by others. And this is something I totally agree with.



4.) She's a "naturalista". Meaning she's carrying her God given natural African hair with all its kinks and curls; she decided to cut off her permed hair when she got to the US and needed a perm but it was quite expensive getting it done in the saloon. Therefore, she got a relaxer kit and did the perm herself at home. She ended up with burns on her scalp and then she questioned herself regarding the essence of getting a perm and going through all the unnecessary pain. So she did the big chop and started growing her natural hair.



5.) I admire her sense of style. She wears a lot of African prints and she makes it look so elegant and chic.







There you have it! Those are the five major things I love about Chimamanda. I hope to be a good writer like her some day and I urge you to pick up any book of hers and read. My favorites are "Americanah", "The Thing Around Your Neck" and "Purple Hibiscus".

So, any thoughts on Chimamanda? Have you read any of her books and what did you like or dislike most about it? Let me know in the comments section below. Until my next post, stay well and happy.

xo, Evita.

Hey lovely people! Long time right? Well, I've been MIA (missing in action) for some reasons but I'm back now. Life really has a way of handing you some serious lemons but I've decided to make the sweetest lemonade out of mine. So, how have you been? Hope all is well and you're in good health.

Ok. On to the topic of the day. Age. How old are you? Lol! Most people dread that question especially ladies and I really don't blame them. In my opinion(I have lots of opinions abi?) I feel we should all be proud of how old we are but society has made it seem like a sin to age. Come on, we all want to be old and gray but we want to remain forever young. Remember Jay Z's song "Forever Young" featuring Mr Hudson? "I wanna be forever young..." I have to admit though, getting old is scary but its something that can't be evaded.




As a teenager I couldn't wait to be in my 20s. Now I'm in my 20s and I suddenly want to become a toddler again, not even a teenager. Let me be pampered and have no worries except sleeping, eating and playing. Haha! The demands of adulthood are so many but what can we do? You have to brace up and be an adult. Nobody cares anymore. You have to make things happen and I can sincerely tell you that being 20 something isn't so much fun. Expectations everywhere. But we're capable right? Yes, I'm capable.

You come across job vacancies and the age thing hits you again. "Candidate has to be 24-28..." Can we really blame those who celebrate their 26th birthday in 4 consecutive years? So if I'm 29 I won't be able to get the job done? That's age discrimination if you ask me.




A lot of ladies are in the habit of hiding their real age. When asked how old they are especially by a guy, some tend to pick offense or lie about it. Is it such a big deal? It doesn't make you less or more of a person. Does it? Does lying about it change the fact that you're still aging? Lol. Mind over matter. You shouldn't be judged by your age.

There's no manual that says at 21 you should be doing this and not that. I don't mean you should be nonchalant about issues just because you're 20 something, but once you have a sense of responsibility all else would flow.

Being "forever young" is all in your mind. It is a state of mind and not a state of being. After all, we all want to grow old and by God's grace we will not only age but age gracefully. As for me being asked my age, I'll gladly tell you because it's not a big deal.

Hello everyone. So today I'm writing about accidents. Road accidents to be precise. I want to share with you my thoughts during that moment between life and death. And also, how God always guides and protects our every move, provided you obey Him by listening to your instincts. Because I believe that tiny voice in your head that tells you yes or no when you're about to do something is the voice of your guardian angel sent from God.

I've had four major road accidents in my lifetime and I strongly believe that if I were to die, it wouldn't be because of a road accident. I've survived four and I know by God's grace, I would never experience such again.

The first 3 accidents I had left me with no major injuries at all, just little scratches on my palm and elbow. But the one that scared me the most was in 2012. I was in Benin city to start my final clearance in school and I was on my way to an aunt's house when it happened.

I was very tired after walking from office to office in my faculty building and I just wanted to go home. On getting to the bus stop outside my school, there were no buses, just motorcycles and I didn't have the patience to wait for a bus. The little voice in my head said," wait for 5 more minutes and if you don't see a bus, take a bike" But no, I wanted to get home that instant. I was tired. So I hailed a bike and my journey started. I felt really unsettled and I couldn't hear the little voice in my head anymore. Less than 5 minutes into the journey, the unexpected happened.

The guy riding the bike was trailing closely behind this 14 seater bus that belonged to a popular transport company in Benin. I noticed the driver seemed like he didn't know where he was going because the way he drove suggested he was confused. As I was about to tell my bike guy to give him a little gap, he tried to overtake the bus and the next thing we knew the bus driver also swerved in the same direction.

"Jesus!!!" I screamed. Next thing I was rolling on the express road, I don't know how many times I rolled but I rolled more than thrice. I started seeing the faces of my loved ones flash before me, I remembered all the good times we had and for a second I thought that was the end. I thought I was gone for good. I opened my eyes and expected to see myself on the queue to meet with St Peter at heaven's gate. Instead I was surrounded by onlookers at the sidewalk and for a nanosecond, I didn't know where I was. Then I remembered. I had fallen from a bike and this was an accident.

I sat up, looked around. My bag was wrapped around my arms. I looked at my feet, the right foot of my shoe was missing. I checked my arms, they had bruises. I touched my head, no sign of bleeding. Ok, I'm safe. "Thank you Jesus..." I said this repeatedly and then the onlookers who were very sympathetic began to ask questions. One particular man asked me my name, where I was coming from and going to. I guess he just wanted to make sure I wasn't in shock. The bike guy was terribly injured. As I tried to get up, I felt a sharp pain on my waist and my leg left. I was badly injured this time.

It was a really long day and I spent it in the accident and emergency ward of the University of Benin Teaching Hospital. Believe me, that's the worst place I've been in my life. It was the longest night of my life. My injury was nothing compared to what I saw that night. I was just thanking God for life till I was discharged the next morning.

You see, when that tiny voice in your head speaks to you, just listen. If I had obeyed mine, I probably wouldn't have had that accident. And be on the alert before you enter public transport. If I feel unsettled with the face of the driver or the conductor of a bus, I usually wait for another to pass by. I'm never in a hurry. It's not a guarantee but better safe than sorry.



I've also stopped making use of motorcycles. If I must, I recite Psalm 23 or 91 till I get to my destination. No jokes. Bike accidents are really horrible because there's nothing protecting you. Any slight touch, you're off in the air or rolling on the ground.

So tell me, have you ever been involved in a road accident before? What was your reaction, what were the things that ran through your mind as it happened? Let me know in the comments section below and have a peaceful weekend ahead.

PS: Christmas is almost here o! Yippee!!! I'm still a baby at heart when it comes to Christmas. So much excitement. Its my favorite time of the year asides my birthday. Let the countdown begin! :D

Question and answer time!

1. What is your best blogging experience?

2.  If you could turn back the hands of time for a day, when would it be?

Hmmm, I don't think I would want to do that because with each day comes its own lessons and these lessons/experiences have shaped me into the person I am today.

3.  List three of your talents.

• Writing

• Dancing

• Listening (This is very different from hearing so yes, I consider it a talent. I'm a very good listener :D)

4.  What job on earth do you consider the most difficult?

Sewage cleaning/maintenance has to be the most difficult and terrible job on the surface of this earth. I can't imagine anything worse than it.

5. Which rules you more; your heart or your head?

I'd say both. I have come to a point in my life where I strived to make a balance of both. Although it's not been easy because I tend to be very emotional sometimes. The world needs you to be tough most times so I let my head lead the way when necessary.

6. Jollof rice or Fried rice?

I can never say no to party jollof rice. You know the type cooked with firewood and has the whole smoke thing going on inside.*drooling* lol! But I'm more of a fried rice person. The vegetable mix is just yum! And I'm a pro at cooking it. Some people can testify to that *wink*

7.  You and your partner have just a million Naira and you have your wedding to budget for, how much will go into it without any external financial assistance?

Ugo this one is JAMB question o! Lol! Now that things are difficult in Nigeria based on the economy, one million naira cannot plan a wedding unless its a very small one void of ceremony. That's an in house wedding. Ok, so if its a quiet wedding with less than 100 guests, I think 600k should be enough to plan it. 100k would be kept aside for miscellaneous expenses which leaves us with 300k to flex. Wait! What about my gown?! Ugo, its not enough joor.lol.

8. What is your favorite foreign meal?

Errmmm...spaghetti bolognaise aka spaghetti and corned beef sauce. That's foreign enough abi?

9.  What's your best fashion accessory?

I love jewelry. Necklaces especially. A statement necklace can totally transform an outfit so jewelry it is.

10.  How do you relax?

Movies and music. I enjoy watching romantic comedy and drama. Action and SciFi movies once in a while. Then I love music(cliché much) but I just love to listen to anything that sounds good. It goes beyond the lyrics. Music is pure art to me.

That's it! I hope I answered well. Now it's my turn to nominate 5 blogs and these are my nominees;

Oluchi of DLeona Life

Sarah of Princess Audu

Yanes of Yanikeur 

Flora George of Flora George

Wendee Isaacs of Wendee Isaacs

My questions;

1.  What inspires your blog posts?
2.  What is the title of the last book you read?
3.  What type of camera do you make use of?
4.  Your favorite Bible verse.
5.  Are you an early bird or a night owl?
6.  A day without your phone or a day without makeup.
7.  What has been your greatest achievement so far this year?
8.  Your top ten fashion and style blogs.
9.  What is your dream vacation destination?
10. What are you listening to on repeat lately?

There you have it! Thanks for visiting as always. You're all appreciated.

"Who's your favorite, mum or dad?" Or "Who do you love more, mum or dad?" This was a reoccurring question during my childhood days and I'm pretty sure it's not strange to most of u as well. What was my answer to this question? Well, I always chose my dad. Daddy was my favorite. Yeah, girls and their fathers. I know.lol. I'm not writing this post to praise my parents. I want to point out something important that I grew up to understand.


A child is said to know the difference between good and bad starting from age 7 and I believe it was at this age I chose who my favorite parent was. I realized that my mum was (is) very strict while my dad was (is) very calm and less strict. So gradually, I tilted more to the direction of my dad. My mum was very quick to say no to some of my demands which sometimes were deemed unnecessary, while my dad on the contrary would approve of these demands 80% of the time. But he knew when to draw the line. There were boundaries and I respected them. He was careful not to spoil me.

As I gradually approached my 13th birthday, things changed. My dad joined the "NO train" with my mum. When I would ask for some certain things he would say, "Ask your mummy". Oh, these two are plotting against me now, I thought. Little did I know he wanted me to see that my mum had the best intentions towards me and she wasn't my "enemy" as I had thought then. My teenage years were very tough but a year into my 20s I understood what it was my parents were doing all along.

My dad wanted to make sure there was a balance in my emotions. He wanted me to see the love in my mum's strictness and I eventually did. From all observations parenting is a huge task and if care isn't taken, the home may become divided because children would tend to set up camp with their favorite parent which is quite unhealthy.




So who's my favorite parent now? Well, I have none because I love them equally. I have come to realize that they are actually a unit and they act in unison. They complement each other. To those who were raised by just one parent please appreciate your mum or dad. For the sole fact that they combined the task of both parents, they should be applauded.

Tell me, who was your favorite parent while growing up? Do you still have a favorite or are you like me who has none? Let me know in the comments section below.

Have a fun filled weekend and stay healthy.
xo, Evita.

Last week Thursday I was taking a stroll on my Twitter timeline and "the proposal" was trending. So I wanted to know what it was all about, who proposed and who was being proposed to. I then discovered that a guy actually proposed to his girlfriend on Twitter. Yes. He took a picture of the ring, mentioned his girlfriend and proposed. In case you're not familiar with how Twitter works let me explain a bit further. Here's what happened, he took a picture of the engagement ring, uploaded it and wrote for example, "@evita will you marry me?"(with the picture of the ring attached) I'm sure you can get a vivid description of what I'm talking about now. Ok?

Twitter Nigeria went on a frenzy. Some people were like "awww! How sweet..." While some people were like "Huh?! Are you for real? Proposing on Twitter?..." And of course, some people made fun out of the whole situation.

Here is my own opinion. I'm not here to criticize or pass judgment on anyone because I'm not a perfect being, I'm also human. It's not entirely my business but I think they made it a bit of everyone's business as it was put up on social media for the whole world to see.

First of all, I don't know the kind of relationship they both have. Maybe they met on Twitter but does that mean a marriage proposal should be done via Twitter? Secondly, what's the problem with this generation?*Question for the gods* But really, what is it? The world is a global village, yes but then, are somethings gradually losing their essence?




Maybe I'm being a little bit dramatic or plain old school but here's what I think. That crucial question, "will you marry me?", is only going to be asked once in a lifetime in most cases and I believe it should be a moment to cherish. Its a memory that will forever be embedded in the minds of both individuals and it should be special. Again, am I virtual that I should be proposed to via the internet? I agree, the internet has made life easier for us but I strongly feel some things should be kept away from it like a marriage proposal for example. It seems like we're all caught in this social media craze. Everything we do is now out there for the world to see. Privacy is becoming extinct and it leaves me wondering what legacies we're going to pass on to the next generation. Loads of selfies with selfie sticks and Instagram pictures?

On the other hand, maybe he wanted it to be a public proposal, for the whole world to see. But there are better ways in my opinion to have gone about it. He could have as well proposed to her in front of her office building or at a fuel station.lol. That's public enough right? Or at a mega shopping mall like Shoprite. It feels insulting on my part to ask my hand in marriage via Twitter. But hey, this is just my opinion. After all, proposal is proposal according to one tweet I saw. And its none of our business as far as he proposed, according to another tweet.

So, my lovely people, what do you think about this Twitter proposal? Are we gradually losing ourselves in this thing called Social Media? Or is this all part of evolution and I'm just being a spoil sport, or old school? Please let me know in the comment section below.

Have a blessed week everyone!
xo, Evita.

Hello friends! Hope everyone is in good health and things are going on well with each and every one of you. Is it just me or this month is quickly passing away? I can still remember October 1st clearly. Anyway, I've had this post in my drafts for a while now so I'm ready to share it with you. Before I start, let me just make it clear that I'm not a relationship expert offering relationship advice in the least. I'm just sharing my thoughts with you based on personal experiences and observations.

Love. Countless songs, poems and movies have and will still be made about love. Lives have been lost, some brought into being because of this enormous four letter word. Wars have being fought, families distraught, all because of love. What is it about love?

I'm very sure most of us are in love or know what it means to be loved and to show love. I'm not talking about romance. Hold that thought. I'm talking about pure and undefiled love. Don't mistake lust for love. Sometimes people "fall in love" because there's something to be gained from their partner at the end of the day. Others fall in love with a person's physical attributes. "Oh, he's so handsome! I think I'm in love with him..." No, that's lust or infatuation. Some people claim to love because they feel lonely and just need someone by their side. This is far from love.




So what is this thing called love? In my opinion, pure and undefiled love starts from the family. The moment a mother holds her child in her arms for the first time, that feeling, that is real love because she can do anything to protect and save the life of her child. When parents sacrifice a whole lot to give their children the best education, that's love.

It goes beyond the family. Friendship. There's love in friendship and I don't mean parasitic relationships where one person keeps draining the other. I'm not talking about fairweather friends who are only found when the going is good. I mean friendship that friends can actually go the extra mile for one another. In there is love. Before going into a romantic relationship, there should be love built on the solid foundations of friendship. To me, without being friends with someone I don't see how a healthy and loving relationship can be built. That's my opinion, you may have yours.





Love goes beyond saying "I love you" all the time, whereas your action says otherwise. It goes beyond words. It doesn't mean you shouldn't say it often to loved ones if it is felt within you. It gives a feeling of reassurance and shows your loved ones that you truly care. But this isn't applicable to most Nigerian parents o.lol. My parents have never told me they love me but I know they do. Its obvious in their actions and the way they speak about you to their friends.



So when I read stories of jealous lovers committing suicide or murder because of love, I'm just left wondering if this is actual love or ordinary jealousy or rage. Because the Bible sums it up in 1st Corinthians 13: 1-13 and verses 4-7 says, "Love is patient and kind, it is not jealous or conceited or proud; love is not ill mannered or selfish or irritable, love does not keep a record of wrongs; love is not happy with evil but is happy with the truth. Love never gives up and its faith, hope and patience never fail."(Good News Bible)

That's it, my take on love. So cheers to true friendships and true love. To those searching for true love, may you find it and hold on to it and to those in love, you've found gold, don't let it go.

xo, Evita.

Hey friends. Hope everything has been going on well with you. I know, long time no post. Ok I'm here now so let's gist. I want to rant. Somethings have been bothering me recently and I decided to bring it up here for discussion. So here goes.

During my service year(NYSC), I was a teacher in a Federal government college and I taught a class in the senior secondary school. I got close to a few of my students and I engaged them in some conversations. I asked them some Biology related questions and they said "Aunty we're not offering Biology o! Its only for Science students..." And I was like ,"What?! Who told you that?!" They said it's how the curriculum operates now that Art students don't offer subjects like Biology and Agric anymore, its now strictly for Science students.



Excuse me! So because I'm an Art student, I'm not supposed to know anything about the Sciences and vice versa? What is the Ministry of Education doing? When I was in secondary school, I offered Biology and Agricultural science and Biology was compulsory for all of us, even those in the commercial class. Even if you want to study Law then you won't know your basic body functions and immediate environment? And even if you want to study Medicine then you're not supposed to know a little bit of Literature? How do you become versatile? What is all this? Economics is also optional now. Its no longer compulsory. Haba! Is it just me or does anyone else understand what I'm talking about?

Then JAMB decided to reduce the cut off mark for their examination. *sigh* Are we now encouraging failure? Isn't the Ministry of Education supposed to take measures to increase the standard of education so students can do better at school and come out with better results?

Oh! Then I heard History is about to be scrapped from the curriculum.



Please tell me its a joke. History?! Why don't we value our heritage? Why don't we like to promote our traditions and culture? The typical American is very knowledgeable about their history and they're being taught in school as from elementary school (primary school). What is the problem? I'm just wondering the kind of education our unborn children are going to receive in the nearest future.

Then my 6 year old niece in primary 2 came back from school last week and said they're now making use of biros in their class. Primary 2? Biro? LOL! A child in primary 2 is yet to have a legible and steady handwriting and they're being told to make use of biros? How do they correct mistakes? They start canceling and making rough notes right? How do they improve their handwriting? I didn't use biro till I got to primary 4 and I'm grateful for that. We had time for learning how to write, handwriting class. We also had a textbook/ workbook for it. I started making use of biros in primary 5. In the long run it paid off. I'm not boasting but I have a very legible handwriting and I used to get good comments about it back in secondary school. What is happening to the system of education in Nigeria? Where have we gone wrong?

I pray for my country Nigeria. We're 55 years old as a nation but we still have a long way to go. So many sectors need urgent attention and to me, education is the most important. Like we say, the children are the future leaders of tomorrow.

What are your thoughts on this? What other sectors need urgent attention in our dear country? Please leave your opinions in the comments section below.

God bless Nigeria.

Yesterday I read about a lady's struggle with self confidence and self esteem issues and I decided to write something about it because I could relate to a fair extent.

I'm pretty sure some of us have had issues with our self confidence before. I did in my teenage years and thanks to my family who helped in restoring my self confidence. But before I begin, let's know what self confidence/esteem means.


Self-esteem refers to how you feel about yourself overall, how much esteem, positive regard or self-love you have. Self-esteem develops from experiences and situations that have shaped how you view yourself today.




Self-confidence is how you feel about your abilities and can vary from situation to situation. I may have healthy self-esteem, but low confidence about situations involving math (this is true). For instance, once I see a math problem I become brain dead.lol. Numbers scare me and it kills my self confidence. My self confidence usually declined during math class but it was always at its peak in Literature class.

When you love yourself, your self-esteem improves, which makes you more confident. When you are confident in areas of your life, you begin to increase your overall sense of esteem. You can work on both at the same time.

So we can now see the similarities between self confidence and self esteem. They go hand in hand. For me, my physical appearance caused my lack of self confidence. I became very cautious about my appearance from age 14-18. I was often teased by friends and classmates about having "k-legs"(knock knees) and this made me create a shell which I always hid in. I confided in my siblings and they told me I shouldn't listen to what anybody says about my legs. I'm not disabled and God loves me the way I am. They really said a lot to boost my self confidence and in the long run it helped.

Let me state it here and now. If anyone tries to bring you down because of a physical attribute on your body, its because they're trying to feel good about themselves (most of the time).



I began to love my legs and embrace myself for who I am. I learnt proper posture and what to wear and what not to. I'm not alone in this "k-leg world". Mariah Carey, Katherine Heigl, Juliet Ibrahim and a host of so many other celebrities have k-legs(Google "knock knees" for more info). Overall, I came to realize that how you present yourself matters a lot.


Jennifer Hudson is just one out of many celebrities with knock knees.


Wear a smile on your face,always. If you're beautifully dressed and you have no smile on, its as good as nothing. When you smile it radiates self confidence. Tell yourself you're beautiful and wonderfully made. Everyone has flaws and nobody is perfect. Learn how to embrace your flaws. Once you make your flaws pronounced, others would notice them. When you begin to love yourself, you attract positive energy towards you and no amount of hatred and spite can weigh you down.

Through the years, I've noticed that my style has evolved and I've also come to realize that style means more than wearing expensive clothes and those that are in vogue or trending.

Growing up, my mum taught me important style lessons that I have come to cherish now that I didn't appreciate back then. There was this rubber sandals that had sparkles in it way back in the 90s. It was very cute and "everybody" had a pair except me. I was about 6 years old at the time. I told my mum then that I wanted a pair and she should get me one but she refused. I can't remember her exact words but she said something which I can still recall. She said "I'm not buying you those sandals because everyone has one. You must not wear what everyone is wearing..."This was my first style lesson but I didn't understand what she meant then. With time it became very clear to me.

I'm not saying you shouldn't buy items that are in trend but don't be so into trends. Gianni Versace once said, " Don't be into trends. Don't make fashion own you, but you decide what you are, what you want to express by the way you dress and the way you live." As my mum would say, "New things come into the market everyday..." I've learnt that style doesn't mean purchasing all the clothes and shoes in vogue just to look stylish. It doesn't mean wearing expensive items.

Don't confuse fashion with style though. Fashion is what you buy, style is what you do with it. According to Ralph Lauren,"Style is very personal, it has nothing to do with fashion. Fashion is over quickly. Style is forever." I am totally not into brands, I'm just a huge fan of quality and I love thrift shopping. So I'd define my style as simple and chic. Sometimes I like to go over the edge but I keep it decent. My style also depends on my mood.

The journey to discovering my style was fun and adventurous with some embarrassing moments. I also learnt a great deal about style from a couple of fashion and style bloggers.



Sarah was the first fashion and style blogger I followed and she's such an inspiration.




Agatha is also a huge favorite and I love her sense of style.




I want to be like Stella when I grow up.lol! She's so elegant and chic!




Priscilla always keeps it simple and classy. I really admire her style.




I've learnt so much from Cassie's blog. Her style is just so it!

These are just a few among many others and I'm grateful to each and every one of them for inspiring me.

In subsequent posts I'll be sharing style tips and inspiration and a peek into my style diary.

With ease, I strolled through the beautiful garden. Savouring the pleasant scents of the roses and lavender flowers spread across the garden in fine rows. "This must be heaven, I could live here". I felt like a princess in this heaven. I was void of worries, no thoughts, just plain happiness. My hair floated in the wind, just like Pocahontas'. My hair. No, my hair was too good to be true. Long, silky and wavy. Yes, this must be a dream. Time to wake up. I looked down at myself and I was in my nightgown, no shoes or sandals on. This was the confirmation I needed. A real princess should be draped in the best of clothing and not a mere nightgown with no shoes on.

Suddenly, the scents disappeared. The clouds became dark. The wind came to a halt and "my hair" vanished. It was like this heaven had folded up. I shut my eyes and prayed to see my room when I opened my eyes again. Back to my room and I heaved a huge sigh of relief. But something wasn't right.

I was supposed to be asleep but there I was standing above my body. "Oh no! This isn't right", I said. Wait, I couldn't even hear myself. Oh my God! What's happening? I blinked about a hundred times and then, I couldn't see my sleeping self anymore. I was back in my body. I was awake but I wasn't awake. "What's happening?!"

Feeling trapped in my own body, I began to scream. Kicking my legs and throwing my arms in all possible directions. It felt like I was drowning in this big pool of water but I was on my bed."Who's doing this to me?" Then I became still. "Ok, things must be back to normal. Thank God" I tried to open my eyes but they were stuck. "What now?" Still calm, I decided to sit up but it wasn't happening. I was stuck in a bad dream. All of a sudden, I felt a presence in my room. I couldn't see who it was but I knew someone was with me and this person didn't seem friendly.

I was being attacked. "Jesus! Jesus!! Jesus!!!", I screamed. But my lips were still. This person/spirit didn't retreat but came closer and hovered over me. I didn't relent in calling my Saviour's name as well. Finally, my eyes opened and my lips parted. It was over.

Throughout the day I was wrapped in thoughts concerning this dream. I came to two conclusions, either I was being attacked by an evil spirit somewhere or it was simply a bad dream based on the horror movie I saw 2 nights before I had the dream. But I was wrong. I had a similar dream again a year later then I did a little research on sleep and dreams. I discovered it was a case of Sleep Paralysis.

What is Sleep Paralysis?

Sleep paralysis is the inability to move or speak immediately after waking up. This can be an exceptionally scary time for those afflicted with this weird phenomenon, but despite former beliefs, the feeling of paralysis is not caused by supernatural beings.
 
During rapid eye movement (REM) sleep the brain has vivid dreams, while the muscles of the body are essentially turned off. While sleeping, the muscles are unable to move so that the person won't be able to act out dreams with their body. Sleep paralysis happens when a person wakes up before REM is finished. The person will be conscious, but the body's ability to move hasn't been turned back on yet.

In the past, it was believed that demons caused sleep paralysis by holding people down or sitting on their chest. This was often due to hallucinations, which are a common symptom during sleep paralysis because the brain is still in a dream state. People have reported seeing ghosts, demons and other strange apparitions while experiencing paralysis.

According to the UK National Health System (NHS), sleep paralysis is not dangerous, though those experiencing extreme sleep paralysis may be prescribed a short course of antidepressant medication, such as clomipramine.

During the attack it is important to stay calm and realize that it will pass soon. "There’s not much you can do during an attack besides say to yourself, 'This is only temporary. It will pass very shortly and I will be able to move soon," Dr.Harris said. "This really only works if you’ve had an episode or two before and know what to expect. These attacks can be quite scary to experience, especially if you’ve never had one before."

So, if you've experienced this before, fear not. You're not being attacked by some demons or evil spirits or the witches in your village.lol! It's just a case of sleep paralysis. Nevertheless, say your prayers when you wake and before going to bed.